Find us on
Monologue Genie
  • Home
  • Monologues
    • Female Monologues
    • Male Monologues
    • 2 Minute Monologues >
      • 2 Minute Terrible Being Nice Monologue
      • 2 Minute 26 Year Old Bar Mitzvah Boy Monologue
      • 2 Minute Monologue Latte Factor
      • 2 Minute Ate the Divorce Papers Monologue
      • 2 Minute I Kissed Marisa Monologue
      • 2 Minute Breaking Up with Brandon Monologue
      • 2 Minute Fact Checker Monologue
      • 2 Minute Honey I'm a Leprechaun Monologue
      • 2 Minute Quiche isn't Sexy Monologue
      • 2 Minute Puppy Room Monologue
      • 2 Minute Three of Us Monologue
    • 1 Minute Monologues
    • Monologues from Plays FEMALE
    • Monologues from Plays MALE
    • Monologues For Teens
    • Monologue Recommendations >
      • Monologues For Men
      • Monologues For Women
      • Comedic Monologues
    • All Monologues >
      • Ate Divorce Papers Monologue
      • Its Terrible Being Nice Monologue
      • Hit and Run Monologue
      • Serial Dater Monologue
      • Switching Sides Monologue
      • Conjugal Connections Monologue
      • Turkey Day Monologue
      • Yoga Fart Monologue
      • Fire the Boys Monologue
      • New Year's Wish
      • Namaste Bitch
      • Quiche isn't Sexy
      • The Matzah Thief Monologue
      • Un-Chatty Cathy Monologue
      • Death by Peanut Monologue
      • Deafening Applause Monologue
      • Surrender My Love Monologue
      • Space is Nicer than Here Monologue
      • 12 Years Wise
      • My Father's Blue Eyes Monologue
      • Breaking Up with Brandon Monologue
      • I Kissed Marisa Monologue
      • I'm More Man than You Monologue
      • Almost 16 Monologue
      • Flunking Yoga Monologue
      • I Meditate Wrong Monologue
      • The Farting Yogi
      • Coffee Slave Monologue
      • Miss Havisham
      • The Gratitude List
      • Secret Identity
      • Secret Identity (Extended Version)
      • Always Smiling Monologue
      • There's No Place Like Oz Monologue
      • My Tattoo
      • Art Schooled Monologue
      • Don't Blame the Muse Monologue
      • Cranky Wife Monologue
      • A Good Pudding Monologue
      • Sleepless in Sukhasana
      • Welcome to FLY Yoga
      • Naked Barbies Monologue
      • Ken Doll Theft Monologue
      • Bell Shaped Body Monologue
      • Recess Monologue
      • Supreme Leader
      • The Roadrunner Never Looks Down Monologue
      • Most Frightening Wonderful Thing Monologue
      • Killing Chuck Monologue
      • 26 Year Old Bar Mitzvah Boy Monologue
      • Fact Checker Monologue
      • Honey, I'm a Leprechaun Monologue
      • The Cheese Robber Monologue
      • Best Lazyboy in the Galaxy Monologue
      • Nice Catch Chuck Monologue
      • White Whale of Hotness Monologue
      • Unhandy Man Monologue
      • Maddie's Dad Monologue
      • The Cheerios War Monologue
      • Grow Up Humanity Monologue
      • The Burger Addict
      • Cat Mozart Monologue
      • Road to Ruin; Paved with Kittens
      • Love Sick Monologue
      • Hungry Yuppies Monologue
      • Basketball Therapy Monologue
      • Indestructible Super Puppies Monologue
      • Good Humor Man Monologue
      • My Dad's so Uncool its Cool Monologue
      • We're All Kings Monologue
      • Saint Peter the Cheater
      • Sleeping with Sleep Monologue
      • Wife Alert Monologue
      • Pretty Lies Monologue
      • Santa Monologue
      • Secret Identity (Extended Version)
      • Teen Monologues - Pinball Eyes
      • Teen Monologues - Scared Popular
      • Teen Monologues - Not Impressed
      • Teen Monologues - Candy Girl
      • Save this Divorce
      • Mission to Prom Monologue
      • Hungry Elsa Monologue
      • 85th Asana Monologue
      • The Three of Us Monologue
      • I Hate the Divorce Papers Monologue
      • This Anomaly Monologue
      • The Metta Tater
  • More Stuff
    • Monologue Writing 101
    • Monologue Catalogue
    • Monologue Books
    • Monologue Performances
    • Magic Carpet
    • Contact

2 Minute Monologues for men | "Honey I'm a Leprechaun" by Gabriel Davis


Picture
Honey, I'm a Leprechaun (2 Minute Monologue)
Comedic monologue under 2 minutes from the play Goodbye Charles
by Gabriel Davis

Why can't you accept I'm a leprechaun?  Look at the facts.  There's a salary freeze but I got a raise.   The market took a beating, but my stocks are up.   Housing values are in the toilet, just not our house.  How do you explain that rainbow in our back yard? Just lingering out there a week in low humidity!?

C’mon, you have to accept this.  People change.  Not usually into leprechauns but this can't come as a total surprise.  You're on a Special K diet, I'm on a Lucky Charms diet... I develop five o'clock shadows at 10 am. We have to get it out in the open so we can work through it. 

You know when I couldn't deny it anymore?  After my physical, the sudden medically puzzling height loss. Remember how you comforted me?  Said I was the same strapping man.  But that night, when I came to bed you mumbled in your sleep "I love you, little fella."  There it was.  Little fella.  The truth hurt.   But you reached out and took my hand the way you always do.   Because some things haven't changed.

I know it's scary. But please, accept it. Say "honey I accept that you are a leprechaun."    And then we can get on with the rest of our lives.  What do say?
​

​
Monologue Categories:  2 minute monologues, monologues for men, contemporary monologues, monologues from plays, comedic monologues under two minutes, relationship monologues, marriage monologues, audition, competition.

More two minute monologues

Quiche Isn't Sexy (Female monologue about a bad first date-move)
It's Terrible Being Nice (Female monologue about getting engaged)
I Kissed Marissa (Female monologue about kissing another girl)
Breaking up with Brandon (Female monologue about getting out of a toxic relationship)
I Ate the Divorce Papers (Female monologue; a 2-minute version of this old chestnut)
Latte Factor (Female monologue about how people treat baristas) 
The Three of Us (Female monologue about convincing a fiance to let mommy move in)

26 Year Old Bar Mitzvah Boy (Male monologue about getting a later life do-over on a failed Bar Mitzvah)
Puppy Room (Male monologue about reforming the prison system ... with puppies!)
Honey I'm a Leprechaun (Male monologue about a man's metamorphosis into leprechaun) 
Fact Checker (Male monologue about a rational fact checker falling in love, despite all the facts that say he shouldn't)

2 Minute Monologues

1 Minute Monologues

Female Monologues from Plays 

Male Monologues from Plays

Monologues for Teens

Monologue Genie is a free resource created by Gabriel Davis to support those seeking audition material. Monologues on this site written by Gabriel Davis are royalty free for use in audition and competition; for other uses contact gabriel@alumni.cmu.edu. For monologues not written by Gabriel Davis that are recommended on this site royalties may apply so be sure to contact the relevant author or their agent for permission to use their work.

Monologue Genie is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a way for websites to earn advertising revenues by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.

Copyright © 2022