2 Minute Monologues for Women | "It's Terrible Being Nice" by Gabriel Davis
![]() It's Terrible Being Nice (2 Minute Monologue)
Comedic monologue under 2 minutes from the play Goodbye Charles by Gabriel Davis Don’t do it! Don’t open that little box one more crack! Don’t ask me to marry you. Shh, shh, shh. Don’t say another word. Just listen. I can’t let you do this to me. I mean, before I met you I used be such a jerk. I mean, seriously, everyone at work thought I was a huge jerk. No one actually liked me. Those people I introduced to you as my friends. They're not my friends. They're scared of me. But since being with you, I’ve begun to feel all...warm inside. Fuzzy. I find myself wanting to stroll in the park and whistle! I have these thoughts, these urges to donate to charities and help out in soup kitchens, and hug people. Don’t you see? Don’t you see you’re making me NICE!? And what really scares me is that you’ll open that box and ask me to marry you, and I’ll...I’ll just nicely say “yes,” and then I’ll be nice for life. Please, for the love of God, put that box away. I mean, the planet already has millions of nice people. It doesn’t need me too. Please, stop, don’t—I’m asking you – No, I’m begging you – I’m getting down on my knees. Will you please, please not marry me? Monologue Categories: 2 minute monologues, monologues for women, contemporary monologues, monologues from plays, comedic monologues under two minutes. The It's Terrible Being Nice monologue is from the play Goodbye Charles, available digitally (click here) and in print (click here)
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MONOLOGUES
Women's I Ate the Divorce Papers It's Terrible Being Nice Serial Dater Switching Sides Conjugal Connections Turkey Day Yoga Fart Hit and Run Fire the Boys Grow Up Humanity New Year's Wish Namaste Bitch Quiche isn't Sexy The Matzah Thief Un-Chatty Cathy Death by Peanut Deafening Applause Surrender my Love Space is Nicer than Here My Father's Blue Eyes Breaking Up with Brandon I Kissed Marisa I'm More Man than You Almost 16 The Farting Yogi 12 Years Wise Miss Havisham The Gratitude List Secret Identity Indestructible Super Puppies Always Smiling Men's Frightening Wonderful Thing Killing Chuck The Fact Checker Honey I'm a Leprechaun 26 Year Old Bar Mitzvah Boy |