15 More Funny Monologues
Still on the hunt for hilarity in monologue form? Read on!
- Dad, can I please get 'Machine Gun Your Face 4' for Christmas? (Stephen Statler)
Synopsis: This laugh out loud monologue for teen boys does a great job lampooning violent video games. A teenage boy tries to get his dad to buy him a video game called “Machine Gun Your Face 4.” Obviously his dad isn't supportive. He says his dad is outside the what normal parents do! His friends’ parents let them play games which are way more violent. Games with names like “Kill Everything 2”, “Jugular Cutter 2”, and “Bleedout 6.” The monologue is structured for maximum hilarity while never sacrificing for the jokes the character’s strong objective - getting dad to buy him "Machine Gun Your Face 4." Strong playable objective equals abundantly actable in audition; lots to play with here. Read the full monologue on McSweeney's. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Funny Monologues for Teenage Boys, Satirical Monologues, Comedic Monologues for Teens.
- Ghost of a Chance (Pamela Hooks)
Synopsis: A real estate agent shows potential buyers a beautiful home; only problem - it's haunted. Solid comedic monologue; versatile and appropriate for women late twenties, middle aged, senior. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Funny Awkward Monologues, Professional Female Comedic Monologues, Comedic Monologues for Middle Aged Actresses.
- Friday Night is for Relaxing, Right? Sure it is. (Susan Hyssen)
Synopsis: A young woman decides to be a grown up and get fresh fruits and veggies at the market to cook for Friday night dinner. Unfortunately, with natural fresh foods come natural things like wasps. One gets into her purse, where she is stung while reaching for her keys, and it then migrates to her hair. A relaxing trip to the market ends in the urgent care as an allergic reaction takes hold. So much for fresh food, next Friday "Taco Godamned Bell." Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Young Adult Female Funny Monologues, Comedic Monologues About Busy Professional Young Women, Monologues for Cosmopolitan Young Women, Sarcastic Female Monologues, Farcical Monologues for Young Women.
- The Far Flung (Julie McKee)
Synopsis: A parishioner who would love to have a bigger part in the church pageant, tries to get it by speaking of her love of the theatre, but digresses quickly into a rant about her husband's limited appreciation for theatre and total lack of religious faith. In fact the only thing he believes in is gardening - specifically tomatoes. When he passes he'd like to be buried under his tomatoes. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Funny Monologues Religious Women, Monologues About Women of Faith, Female Comedic Monologues about Churchgoers and Church Pageants, Comedic Monologues about Marriage, Comedy Monologues about Theatre People, Monologues About Disgruntled Wives, Humorous Monologues about Unsatisfying Marriages.
- Exit, Pursued by a Bear #3 (Lauren Gunderson)
Synopsis: A stripper with aspirations of acting in Shakespeare meets a woman trapped in an abusive relationship and hatches a plan of Shakespearean proportions to help the woman. Murder most foul.. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Monologues Exotic Dancer, Dark Comedy Monologues Murderesses, Funny Female Monologues Revenge.
- Eve's Diary (Mark Twain)
Synopsis: Eve is determined to please Adam and not bruise his fragile ego. When she realizes he struggles to find names for all the animals in the garden, a skill which comes naturally and easily to her, she devises a clever way to protect Adam's ego while still naming all the animals herself. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Biblical Monologues, Light Humorous Monologues, Monologues about Adam and Eve, Garden of Eden Monologues.
- Check Please (Jonathan Rand)
Synopsis: A woman with multiple personality disorder while out on a date realizes she's late to take the pill that keeps her alters in check. She takes the pill and while the various people within her begin to reveal themselves, she assures her date that in just a minute she'll be back to only one personality and nine times out of ten it's one of the normal ones. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Funny Female Monologues Multiple Personalities, Humorous Monologues about Insanity.
- Brogue (Duncan Pflaster)
Synopsis: A businesswoman confesses to her male Scottish coworker that she has a thing for Scottish guys and can no longer work with him professionally. Therefore, she tells him, she's done the only rational thing in the situation, given her boss her two minute notice and quit the company thereby freeing herself up for a date with him. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Humorous Monologues for Women, Monologues About Having Crushes, Romantic Comedy Monologues, Monologues About Modern Workplace Romance.
- The Bray of the Belles #1 (David-Mathew Barnes)
Synopsis: A southern belle in her early thirties encounters her childhood nemesis at a wedding shower. Pouring the saccharine sweetness on thick, she flings a series of insults thinly disguised as compliments at her childhood frenemy. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Catty Female Monologues, Funny Sassy Female Monologues, Female Monologues Southern Accent.
- Bite Me (Nina Mansfield)
Synopsis: A woman tells her husband how she successfully defended herself from a vampire with her Tory Burch handbag and a pepper spray and oh yeah, she captured him too and he's locked in their Escalade right now! Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Dark Comedy Monologues for Women, Satirical Female Monologues, Monologues about Kick-Ass Women, Comedic Monologues about Vampires.
- The Big Hat (Martha Patterson)
Synopsis: A loose, boozy aging southern woman who has until now survived on her beauty talks about the aunt she modeled herself on and how she's going to cope with becoming middle aged: big hats. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 5. Monologue Categories: Monologues about Getting Older, Middle Aged Female Monologues, Southern Accent Monologues.
- Hold Please (Annie Weisman)
Synopsis: A secretary who has just been fired tells her boss she's psyched because she's now free to pursue her true passion: becoming a hip hop artist that raps about clerical work called "White Out." The rap is genuinely funny. The monologue has that "I've got nothing to lose and I no longer give a f##** energy. She's taking her last moments in the office to demonstrate that she's more clever and talented than her boss who just fired her. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 4. Monologue Categories: Monologues for Young Women from Plays, Angry Rant Monologues, Yelling at Your Boss Monologue, Monologues about Getting Fired, Funny Sassy Female Monologues, Twenty-Something or Thirty-Something Monologues, Strong Outspoken Women Monologues.
- He Said, Then I Said (Gus Edwards)
Synopsis: A country girl in her twenties with little education and a straightforward way of expressing herself is put on the spot with the question "how does a girl go about getting a husband". Her answer is honest and unashamed. A man said to her, "you don't know nothin 'bout music" to which she replied "You don't know nothin' bout nothin." The man retorts he knows lots and he can prove it to her ... in bed. She takes him up on the challenge. Turned out, the man knew a lot! Dating followed then marriage. Source: 222 More Comedy Monologues 2 Minutes and Under Vol 4. Monologue Categories: Monologues for Young Women, Country Girl Monologues, Romantic Comedy Monologues, Sexy Monologues.
- Sex with a Mathematician (Pete Barry)
Synopsis: After realizing that she and her date (a mathematician) are not a good match, Sara explains to her date that while she's not interested in him as a person she was planning to get laid so can they cut the boring and tedious small talk and skip to the pleasurable part of the evening? Source: Plays for Three. Monologue Categories: Monologues for Young Women, Dark Comedy Monologues, Strong Female Monologues, Monologues about Sex, Monologues about Dating.
- Thanksgiving Blessings (Carla Cackowski)
Synopsis: A pilgrim saves his community from starvation by trading his wife's shoes, his own shoes and his horse shoes for a Thanksgiving feast. Appreciated: The humor of the pilgrim sacrificing his wife's shoes before his own and eventually being stripped of all shoes (his own and even his horse's). The fixation of the Indian chief on shoes is funny. The stakes are high. The pilgrim has to successfully negotiate a trade with the Indian chief for food or he, his wife and their community will starve. Source: Men's Comedic Monologues That Are Actually Funny. Monologue Categories: Humorous Monologues for Men, Comedic Male Monologues, Monologues Pilgrims, Monologues History Satire, Thanksgiving Monologues.