1-Sentence Summary: After realizing that she and her date (a mathematician) are not a good match, Sara explains to her date that while she's not interested in him as a person she was planning to get laid so can they cut the boring and tedious small talk and skip to the pleasurable part of the evening?

Appreciated: Depiction of a strong outspoken woman who knows what she wants and owns her sexuality unabashedly.

Age Range 20's
​Character's gender is female.
Monologue genre is comedic.
Find this monologue in the collection of short plays "Plays for Three" in the play "Sex with a Mathematician" by Pete Barry.
Monologue starts with the line "Listen, Shirty" and ends with "Let's skip the torture and jump right to the pleasure. (Sizes him up) In whatever quantities we can get it."

​Monologue Writing 101 Elements (0 = Not Used. 1 = Used. 2 = Strong Usage)
​1. Strong Want - 1. To get laid.
2. High Stakes - 0.5
3. Tactical Variety - 2. To break the stigma of casual sex "we're just mammals." To get him to own up to how bad the internet dating service screwed up. To set herself apart from how most women she (and likely he) knows and why she love vets by different rules. All tactics serve to sell him on the idea.
4. Hook Opener - 2. Two words grab attention, show spunk, and establish her character's persona fast. Unique word choice "Shirty."
5. Button Finish - 2. Gives the actress an active reaction to play as she sizes he guy up. Comic gold potentially here. Try different deliveries with colleagues! Humor comes from the honest emotional moment. So what genuine reaction to the guy might someone be having that would make you giggle if you witnessed it?
6. Sensory - 0
7. Internal Obstacles - 0
8. Past/Present Balance - 0. All present action here. That's a good thing! (IF a monologue is a rememberence then it must be connected to and furthering the active present moment in some way).
9. Discovery - 1. If Sara doesn't know she's going to be so blunt (until the moment she is) it will have more power than if she had planned to say it or this is a shtick she uses frequently.
10. Restraint - 1. Understanding the moment before a monologue is key here. If Sara was biting her tongue and suffering inside the whole date until this moment, then she's been restraining her frustration until this moment when she releases it. This monologue is in part fantasy fulfillment. The thing we wish we were brave enough to come out and say. Sara likely feeling no liberated as she blows past the normal human fear of hurting the person she's with to being brutally honest.
TOTAL "ELEMENT USAGE WEIGHT": 9.5

Loved this one!

Tags: Comedic female monologues, Comedic monologues for women, Womens monologues, Audition monologues for women, Contemporary monologues, Modern monologues, Monologues from published plays, comedy monologues, comedic monologues, funny monologues, humorous monologues, 1 minute monologues, hilarious monologues, monologues for young women, strong outspoken female characters, sassy monologues, monologues about dating.

1-Sentence Summary: A pilgrim saves his community from starvation by trading his wife's shoes, his own shoes and his horse shoes for a Thanksgiving feast.

Appreciated: The humor of the pilgrim sacraficing his wife's shoes before his own and eventually being stripped of all shoes (his own and even his horse's). The fixation of the Indian chief on shoes is funny. The stakes are high. The pilgrim has to successfully negotiate a trade with the Indian chief for food or he, his wife and their community will starve. The high stakes are established right at the top, orienting the audience right away to the dramatic situation (even comedy needs to hang its humorous bits on solid dramatic construction).

Age Range 30's to 60's
​Character's gender is male.
Monologue genre is comedic.
Find this monologue in the collection "Men's Comedic Monologues That Are Actually Funny." I believe it is standalone (not from a play).

​Monologue Writing 101 Elements (0 = Not Used. 1 = Used. 2 = Strong Usage)
​1. Strong Want - 1. To feed his family and community!
2. High Stakes - 1. Make a successful trade or starve.
3. Tactical Variety - 1. Tries to charm the chief (fails), tries to evoke sympathy (fails), tries to trade things other than his shoes (fails).
4. Hook Opener - 1. Opens with pilgrim saying if he fails, they'll all starve.
5. Button Finish - 1. Closes with shoeless pilgrim asking to borrow some moccasins.
6. Sensory - 0
7. Internal Obstacles - 0
8. Past/Present Balance - 0
9. Discovery - 0.5. I suppose when each bag of food is handed to him as well as various reactions the chief is having can play as discoveries.
10. Restraint - 0
TOTAL "ELEMENT USAGE WEIGHT": 5.5

Tags: Comedic male monologues, Comedic monologues for men, Mens monologues, Audition monologues for men, Contemporary monologues, Modern monologues, Monologues from published books, Monologue collections, comedy monologues, comedic monologues, funny monologues, humorous monologues, historical monologues.

1-Sentence Summary: A frustrated video store employee who just quit her job at Galaxy Video begs for it back.

Appreciated: Love the journey she takes, from struggling with the fact that she hates people (especially video store customers who ask dumb questions and put videos back in the wrong sections), looking inward to find out why (she can do that, look inward, because she "takes Yoga"), going to her and therapist to explore deeper, to realize it's because she's a talented stick figure artist. She draws stick figures!

Age Range 20's to 30's.
​Character's gender is female.
Monologue genre is comedic.
Find this monologue on page 44 of "222 Comedy Monologues: 2 Minutes and Under."

​Monologue Writing 101 Elements (0 = Not Used. 1 = Used. 2 = Strong Usage)
​1. Strong Want - 1
2. High Stakes - 0.5
3. Tactical Variety - 0
4. Hook Opener - 0.5
5. Button Finish - 1
6. Sensory - 0.5
7. Internal Obstacles - 2
8. Past/Present Balance - 2
9. Discovery - 1
10. Restraint - 1
TOTAL "ELEMENT USAGE WEIGHT": 9.5

Loved this monologue!

Tags: Comedic female monologues, Comedic monologues for women, Womens monologues, Audition monologues for women, Contemporary monologues, Modern monologues, Monologues from published plays, comedy monologues, comedic monologues, funny monologues, humorous monologues, 2 minute monologues.

Comedic monologue for a man. Character name is Ed. Age is unspecified, I'd say part reads as erudite adult male and could be anywhere from 20's, 30's, 40's on up. Monologue can be delivered within one minute.

Monologue starts on page 21 of Ives' short play collection "Time Flies."

Opening line "A stroke of genius. I decide to be Degas for a day." Close the monologue on "...are Degas and I not united by our shared humanity? By our common need for love, coffee, and deodorant?"

​Get Time Flies by David Ives.

Comedic one minute contemporary monologue for a woman.

Character is Fifi LeBlanc. In this bizarre and funny monologue Fifi tells us how she is someone's hallucination and questions the true nature of her identity. Big questions, bigger laughs!

Starts on page 97 of "Time Flies" with the line: "In the great dance of life, the possible positions are so many, the organs are so few."   Ends with:  "Class, what is the question."

Favorite bit: "...am I really Fifi LeBlanc, former au pair- or am I Aphrodite, the eternal goddess of love? Or am I, as I have begun to suspect, Franklin Spong, a gym teacher from Kankakee, wearing a dress? And how does this affect my health insurance?"

​​Get Time Flies by David Ives.